Money Management for Couples: What to Do When Your Opinions Differ

by Stacy Francis, CFP®, CDFA

Something interesting happened in my latest Savvy Ladies telephone conference. When one woman told the group that her husband’s sloppy attitude toward money was so frustrating to her, she wanted to divorce him for this reason alone, every woman in the group expressed their support. Several of the married ones even told her they could relate because they were having similar issues in their marriages.

It is no secret that “financial differences” is one of the most common reasons couples split. While sad indeed, there are things you can do to get past these issues. Below are just a few.

  1. Draft a budget. Sit down together and put your expenses and financial goals on paper. Be realistic, and make sure that sticking to the budget won’t require too much effort. Remember that budgets are like diets – they never work if they’re unrealistic.
  2. Communicate. It is common knowledge that lack of communication rarely solves any problems, yet so many couples fail to talk openly about their financial differences. Approach them in a calm, non-threatening way, and focus on finding constructive solutions that you work for both of you.
  3. Be considerate. Whether you intend it or not, the way you manage your money will affect your spouse as well. Make sure he or she is comfortable with your spending and investment habits.

If this doesn’t work, consider seeing a marriage counselor, a financial planner, or both. They can apply an outsider’s perspective to your specific situation, and hopefully find solutions that will get you past your problems. Remember, you are far from alone.


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